GroomPod 482 Cleaning with steam and Customer service the power of QTIP transcript

Susy 0:03

Hi everyone welcome to episode 482 of the Grumpod. I'm Suzy the Grumer and I'm here with my best buddy Barbara Bird and today's show is all about a massive workplace detox. First step we're talking about horsepower and high temperatures. I'm going to break down the ultimate guidelines for using steam cleaners inside your mobile lands or in your salon where it works miracles or you can absolutely ruin your expensive gear. So you got to know how to do it safely and we're going to look at that then we are shifting from deep cleaning our physical space to deep cleaning our mental space. Barbara's going to take a mic to talk about Qtip quick taking it personally. We've all had that client who leaves a review or makes a comment that sting Barbara is going to share her gold in strategies on how to build an emotional firewall between your business and your self worth. It's episode so let's get rolling. Barbara I want to thank our supporters what do you think of that?

Barbara 1:05

Hey it's always a good idea because they support us.

Susy 1:11

They do. And that includes all the people on patreon and all the people who donated our website thegrumpod.com and our corporate sponsors Best Shot Show Season Precision Sharp Groomer and Stasco. Did you know that Stasco has come out with a couple of new products? First there is the Stasco oatmeal protein conditioner. This conditioner provides exceptional body and manageability and super shiny finishes. And it has a wonderful apple scent that I love. Great no recirculator too. And they have a new matching protein conditioning spray, demapping, anti-static conditioning and finishing all in one just like the original Stasco spray, but with that delicious apple fragrance. Look for these new products, App Trade shows and your favorite distributors like cascade grooming supplies. Okay I got a little crazy with the power and the multiple dogs in the grooming shop in the new van thing. You know I had three. I did three shitsuits and I was trying to figure out what's the most efficient way to do all three shitsuits. Two of them live in one household, one of them is the daughter's dog. So what I did was I washed the daughter's dog first who has to go home first. Then I put that dog into the crate, put the blower on. Then I washed the two dogs that live together. And then I pulled the first dog out, put those two in the dry and crate, put the blower on them. Then I dried the first dog and finished him, sent him on his way. Then I pulled out the second dog and dog on it, I did like the way the hair finish was. Well, the passive drying, it left less than desirable finish on the shitsu hair. So I think that I need to rewek and straighten the hair when it comes out that way. Is that really, is that the right thing to do?

Barbara 3:09

Yeah, well at least you need to at least spray it down and redrive it. You don't necessarily have to do another bath. In fact, I would suggest that you not

because you just don't want to subject the microphone and the skin to more detergent action than is necessary. So I would say, let us spray it down. You can use diluted conditioner or a leaving conditioner too. I have to do that to my hair because my hair has the opposite experience, is that if I don't take care of it and wet it, it just gets straight. I don't know why that is, it's kind of counterintuitive, but it straightens out and just becomes a big ball of frizz, which gorgeous aura. Regardless.

Susy 4:27

Okay, how about this? I wash the two dogs first and then I open the coat of each of the dogs and kind of blow off the exterior water, which I did not do. I just put them straight in there. Maybe if I blow open the coat and partially dry them and then put them in there, will my finish be better? No. No. Okay.

Barbara 4:55

Because if I take them out before they're fully dry and if you take them out before they're totally dry and you do some air plus brush and stretching the coat out, then you can probably get as good a result as if you did them all the way.

Susy 5:16

Okay.

Maybe what I should do, which worked fine the last time because I hadn't gotten quite so big for my bridges on that particular incident, is do the first dog by himself, the dog that goes home early, just do them start to finish and leave the other two dogs in the house and then do the two dog method which does get the dog out before it's completely dry and finished dry both of the dogs that way and then I'll be happier with their finish because the first dog was okay because he didn't get finished in the crate. He got finished right on the table. The other two that got too dry too quickly for me to dry too quickly.

Barbara 6:03

Yeah. Okay. Because even because and that's something that bathing staff often does not understand that if their if a dog is not thoroughly dry to the skin in every area, it's going to come out curly because it's gonna come messier so you know like yeah, so that.

Susy 6:36

Okay. So I think I can figure it out though. I still think that I can efficiently get the three dogs so I've got two hours out of my day from doing it.

Barbara 6:47

Two hours out and three dogs and some bad.

Susy 6:51

No, it was I was pretty excited about it until did. Yeah. Actually, I would say in three hours would not be too bad. Yeah. I was pretty pleased with myself feeling good about doing that and then but I did just did not like the completely dried and I think it's I'm excited that you're that you are experiencing some

kind of uh great drying.

Barbara 7:25

Yeah, I mean what you couldn't do in the trailer and so now you can do it so you have to go back into a learning mode. That's all, you know like you're just you know reviewing

because you haven't had to put that into practice forever.

Susy 7:42

when T one years since I've been able to do a great drying. That's called a rut.

Definitely. Yeah. I think it's a rut. Yeah. And I have to remember how I worked it when I was at the vet hospital where I did rotate through the cage drying and the multiple dogs and I would have three dogs in at once in groupings and I would work through them and I was happy with the finish so I just need to adjust a few things. Few little things. The other thing that kind of worried me is I was reading the manual again from beginning to end to make sure I know everything. It appears like I need to do a tune up on my generator which I'm not sure that we can do at home like every four months three times a year. Four months? Yeah. That's a lot. But these generators. What did what did Sharon tell you about that? They did, they did that. Yeah. But they see they for them it's a little easier to go pay someone to do that kind of service. For me I find it extremely frustrating that my husband cannot do it because it would take him no time at all to do that but you got to put that you got to send him to trade school. Hey, you gotta learn this. He can do it. But we can't get to the generator without it coming out from the bottom of the truck. Oh, so you need a lift. Yes, a lift that can. Yeah. And a 350 super duty Ford which is huge. It's a one ton truck so it's got heavy running gear and everything. So that is an expensive that and expense that I did not hound on when I was so excited to get all the nice new things and it's true. You know I can figure it out but the place to do the Cummins generator service is an hour away and they leave you sitting there in their waiting room all day because I've talked to brandy a thousand times on the phone when she's been sitting there waiting for service. So I'm going to have to try to figure out pretty darn quick how to deal with that. It is easy to do the oil change though. I can do that nicely myself and change the filter. Is there sort of a cheating way or something that you could? I'm going to get my husband out there who is very good at things like that to see if there's a way in there to do what needs to be done. But I'm afraid that it's going to be a day off. But it's not a day off because you still got to take it down there and sit and wait while they do their thing and then they...

Barbara 10:33

Yeah so let's just like, you know. A day, it's a it's a hundred games of it.

Susy 10:39

My phone's out here.

Barbara 10:41

Yeah I guess.

Susy 10:46

So we've got another interview that we're going to do coming up. It's pretty exciting at least I think it is and it's with Damian Garber from Grumer's Choice about the show season acquisition. So we're going to hear from the other side.

Barbara 10:59

Oh you know speaking speaking of Grumer's Choice and Damian did you pick up that they now also appropriated hypoonic? Oh I did not see that. Yeah.

Susy 11:21

But that explains why there hasn't any product available for people.

Barbara 11:25

Yes I saw that and I said oh boy, what is this? How are they going to make all of that botanical mixture?

Susy 11:38

Ah! Plus they're moving everything to South Dakota. All of the processing will eventually probably be in one spot in South Dakota.

Barbara 11:48

Yeah yeah I that to figure out how I'm going to get my kennel fresh. I think they probably show season has lost all their inventory by now.

Susy 12:02

Yeah. I might have to talk to best shot and use 256 instead because you're a little close I think you're closer to him. Yeah. Yeah anyway.

Barbara 12:15

This best shot

deodorizer coming gallons. Yeah it does. I think so. Yeah I'm gonna I'm gonna put in an order.

Susy 12:33

That was Darryl Alexa. See this is what happens when you are working in your house when you're doing the podcast from your living room anyway so if you guys have any questions about the show season acquisition or about Grumer's Choice, let us know on the Facebook group Facebook dot com slash group slash the group pod and I will include them in our interview questions and hopefully we could have a conversation and see what the future of show season looks like at Grumer's Choice. Yeah.

Barbara 13:11

Yeah I got wind of that there's a more recent eye groom shake up of some sorts happening. What was that all about? Did you get?

Susy 13:26

I'm not sure what's going on there but I think formulas are changing or something like who would know.

Barbara 13:33

We need to get we need to get to the bottom of that because you like I've continued to be an Zacron supporter even though I wavered there for a while.

Susy 13:46

But now I don't know. That's not a bandwagon. I ever really got on because it just didn't I'm not doing the kind of dogs that really were gonna make a huge difference with that kind of a product. The one that the charcoal one. So I never got behind it so much and they're very sophisticated smells didn't turn my cranks. But I don't know. I liked it.

Barbara 14:16

I liked their I liked their Frankers.

Susy 14:19

You're sophisticated and complicated and you like complicated smells. I like simple smells. I like candy and fruit. It's pretty easy. Some flowers.

Barbara 14:32

Did you say my um I, my for me, my ingredient list?

Susy 14:40

Yeah, yes I did and I don't think that she meant for you to use the smell that I wanted. So I was I thought it was pretty to use what? The smell that I picked like she was asking me what my favorite smell was but I don't think she was asking because she wanted to put it in. I knew. I knew your stuff would be sent free.

Barbara 15:03

Well you know like I knew because yet you know like I would just do the if I had my way I wouldn't do shampoo fragrances. Champosers for cleaning and for removing things. I just don't see a reason for them to be fragrance. Oh you can have a pleasure.

Susy 15:29

Pure pleasure for the person doing the bath. It has nothing to do with the yeah. That's just for me.

Barbara 15:37

But considering that fragrance is the allergy of the century. You like I just would you know have it for other other products. You know and I like would ideally have it separate so that you could just spritz it.

Susy 16:07

After the fact I get it. I understand which I won't expect anything.

Barbara 16:12

And that's just the difference between us. And you know like that is you're going to win out because there's more of you. There's more with your views than there are with my views. You know like for sure.

Susy 16:32

I never I never felt like with the exception of maybe three champos the champos deposited fragrance on the dog. There are a few that do. But mostly it just washes right off. So I always have thought of it as purely a groomer pleasure to have shampoo sent it because because it does then when the bubbles release and it infuses the air with scent I love that. I absolutely love it.

Barbara 16:59

But I get what you're trying to understand because it's not but I mean I enjoy fragrances. Yeah I got caught up on Amazon just like screaming through spray on hair hair and body fragrances just because I really I really like them.

Susy 17:23

And I like I like kind of well you're right I like kind of exotic you know like you know can you know kind of stuff like oh yeah yeah you know I like going to a carnival I like walking down the midway and I like smelling the candy apple and the cotton candy and the peanut butter and jelly and the yeah I like food one of my sick. I love peanut butter but I don't think I would want my dog to smell of peanut butter that's okay yeah okay well why don't you take a little break and then we'll be right back and we're gonna talk about like cool new toy okay

ladies and gentlemen please allow me to point you to one of the best whiteener shampoo's in our marketplace we're talking about show season bright shampoo it features a deep cleaning system and a crunchy whiteening system that goes beyond the usual blue colorant with an actual optical brightness and a dash of dimethicone this makes all colors look radiant and glowing and white coats look like new snow get your bright on today show season where every day is a show day you love grooming but the business side not so much between the constant phone calls the no-shows and the messy calendars it's hard to focus on the pets you need groom more the all-in-one software built specifically for salon mobile and house call groomers let clients book online 24/7 send automatic text reminders and manage your payments all in one place spend less time on paperwork and more time doing what you love start your free trial by putting groom pod 22 in the coupon code at groomor dot com there are a lot of nooks and crannies in the van oh wait I forgot this

ready groomers here comes our first appointment yes a lot of nooks and crannies in vana white that's the name of the new van is van a white and i was trying to figure out how to clean in there i was spraying stuff on and trying to get in with my toothbrush on my hands and knees and i thought this is stupid and then i thought back to my mentor barber bird who has more than once mentioned that steam cleaning might just be a fantastic solution and i thought yeah the nooks and crannies this is it so i bought a steam machine and we're gonna have some press some press you took my advice i always well i do i often take your advice i don't always take anybody's advice but i often take your advice and i have right behind me my amazon steam cleaner so here we go that's it let yeah and the great reveal is here let's see and do it yes there you go so it's hard to get an idea of how big these are so i just kind of wanted to bring it here so that's how it's because i thought from the picture it looks like it was bigger exactly that's a good size and they had little wheels or anything they rolled around because i would just be toeing it everywhere but it has a pretty long cord so you let it set it down and work away wherever you need to just really easily and it's very light you're not holding all the water the waters down here it heats up in like 15 seconds and all of a sudden it just starts going and if you look at the top here this is where you put the water in and it's just a little flap with a kind of a funnel shaped hole i see yeah spill and then you put the top on like that and then it's got this on off button and then up and down with settings for the pressure of the steam it's not oh that's good that's quite that's quite an advancement yeah for amazon for 69 bucks and i can't believe that you know suzy my first steam cleaner was called a ladybug and it was kind of a large round red tank and i got that as a result of writing an article about kennel cleaning for pet age

magazine

and i mean and that did you do that on purpose i did i'm sure there you are and where i got it and that machine cost like twelve hundred dollars and now you're buying this early little state of the art

for sixty in bucks i think that's wonderful i want one and definitely i was thinking about you when we were talking earlier to think it made me wonder if that clean my fat grass if i could clean my fat grass with steam right so here's a little of the amazon ad that talks about what's going on here now why is that how do that oh there we go

that's the picture i want to this picture okay so it gets to two hundred and twenty one degrees and it does it really really quickly so much so that they actually give you a pair of gloves rubber gloves so you don't burn your hands which i thought yeah and that temperature is important because you need to have a high temperature to fanatize because not only it's the temperature that kills the germs yes and you see it's got the levels up and down this is just a little bit closer to you apparently it's really good for cleaning your hood over your stove getting the grease off of it i'm going to be all over that and i thought this was cute here it is talking about how hot it is right up close it's a two hundred twenty one when it comes out but a little farther away it off to one eighty so if you want to do the sanitizing this what would you be pretty close yep and uh so you have to it so yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yep and there's the water in that and it's very basic it's just a pressure pump inside and then the fill and if you don't use up all your water then it has a drain at the bottom you could just hold it over the sink and open the drain it has a lip on it though so it's hard to get all of the water out of there so for my playing around with it the other day still has a little bit of water in the bottom which i'm gonna have to figure out how to get that out of there because it could probably smell it i figure i'm gonna do the steam cleaning maybe by some honey oh just throw some vinegar in there yeah do that just put some vinegar add some vinegar and so we'll sit in vinegar water so this is some of the things it does it does really good on your gas stove also really good on your porcelain sinks and your stainless faucets and your car upholstery hello how neat is that and your carpet which who doesn't need the cleaning your carpet we're dog groomers we have pets and that's pretty neat there's a little video that shows her working away it shows how easy lots of attachments yet has lots of options it plugs in it has a 2-prong plug although one side is loaded it's got these little microfiber cloths that go over the handle yeah those are important yeah micro microfiber

cloths are very important to you because that's how you do get a lot of the cleaning done is with the rag after the steam it's it yeah I didn't know that I didn't know that and I also I also did not know let's take this back off and full screen here okay on my back you're back we're big okay after last after two weeks ago I'm a little gun shot so it comes with the the gloves rubber gloves with that surface on them I'm not sure if you're still still silicone this looks like silicone gloves to me they are yeah I think they are they're still it's not really rubber that's good silicone yeah yeah standard because some of us are short and need to get in the corners on the ceiling I think this is gonna work great for that it also has a a crooked one to get in and under and around yeah and then it came with one large nylon brush one large nylon brush and it just snaps in turn on turn it to lock it on and it stays on then they give you they give you two small nylon brushes

those are important for getting into little detailed areas but you'll use those a lot yeah and then chew brass wire brushes for if you're doing your barbecue grill or your your uh what do you call that the fan vent in your kitchen stuff that's what that one for then it has I didn't even of this one I got it I can clean my bird cage whoo with this oh how cool is that and it comes with these two uh sprayer nozzles scrapers so for the bird cage this is going to work great oh that's going to be great okay how come bury test that you wait the first thing I tested was the mirror in my bathroom yeah and I used the squeegee got a squeegee on it and I squeegeed my mirror and I had a full-on flood underneath it I did not realize how much water comes out when you're steaming and I also didn't know what the adjustments were on the top so I probably had it on the wrong pressure yeah what is steam it is it pressure in water absolutely well and here's the little covers you get like three of these to go over the top of the they only get one how many of those covers three three okay yep got three of those and then I've got also the microfiber cloth to wipe it down with I got a regular cloth and then uh and that's it so it came with the extra brushes all over the place all kinds of neat stuff so it cleans and sanitizes without any chemicals that is cat's pajamas right that's the that's the thing no chemicals and it kills 100% of the bad microbes yes and it's super good at corners and slider tracks like your doors go in or your windows slider tracks for your windows it does a great job of cleaning that your table base it just cleans your table base you just steam it and then just wipe off all of the grime and gook and and dander and discuss that gets on those bases ideally you should do that often yeah I would think that's kind of a once and a day yeah even at the end of the day kind of a thing yeah you but I never could get my employees on board doing the steam cleaning I just it I just failed because as soon as my back was turned they would just be spraying and yeah it's just I they just wouldn't use it and I couldn't understand in the summertime because it does generate a lot of heat you you hate it you know but it's quick oh yes it's so easy I mean it's not like you have to scrub really anything although if you were doing your vent fan or something you might need to use the scrubber brushes but for the most part it's freaking amazing and barbecue very instant and in the yeah the stainless steel bathtubs it is hurt this built to clean the scum out of your stainless steel bathtub drains and the whole surfaces shines like new again holy cow and it doesn't take any elbow grease and you know my van came with the cool really super cool great that I'm sure everybody with a wagon tells them yeah we know Susie but it's got this great and a shelf so you can do smaller dogs up higher and bigger dogs down low but it looks like like a cheese grater right it has poked through holes that are really small all over the surface of the grate and each one of those holes looks a little dark and suspicious to me I'm going to be able to blast that right out with the little nozzle of my steamer I didn't do it yesterday because it was late you are just going to Tang girl I am so excited because on the boat we have the same kind of marine vinyl a poultry that covered all kinds of bulkheads and things like that and it was really it was white and it was so difficult to clean and this is just making my interior in the van just oh pop like it was brand new I'm very excited about it they say make sure you're not pointing at it like the electric table motor base like stay away from the bases and the switches and stuff like that but for everything else it's fantastic it is um combined with the little power rotating brush that I got from Costco that's a cleaner brush but it's just it just has a rotating head that combined with the steam oh it's the coolest thing ever I feel so clean and tidy and everything plus the upholstery they say you got to kind of be careful with the upholstery because you can melt the seams or you can soak stuff in the back but if you use the microfiber cloth and keep it moving I can do all of my beautiful red accents in there it's going to look so nice but you do not want to use it for your grooming tools like don't do your blades with the steamer because it really does get water into places that you probably would even have a difficult time blowing out with your hv dryer plus it can actually corrode some of the coatings that they put on there so don't use it for tools not for tools um the surfaces it works best on are like stainless and tile and commercial vinyl and things like that don't use it on composite wood or sealed plastic trim because it can warp um what do you think could I use it on my floor mats on your floor mats?

Barbara 33:48

I would think so I would think so so they're sealed yeah I'm gonna try that yeah I would try it so that the magic number is 212 degrees you have to be above that to do the sanitizing now it'll clean lower you'll definitely be able to clean it but if it's a surface you want to sanitize you want to make sure it's above 212 degrees and also that you go very slowly over the surface to kill the pathogens you can clean pretty fast but you're not doing what you need to do to sanitize unless you really go slowly over those surfaces that that's what kills the pathogens and you were mentioning Barbara that it does create a fair amount of humidity in your space so put your vent then on open your windows put your dehumidifier in the shop on do all of that stuff because otherwise you can end up with no due in places and the other thing is I did test it on the bird cage and I soaked my floor okay I didn't want paying attention I soaked my floor I got it very fat my rug so put towels down on the ground if you need to protect surfaces in the grooming shop maybe not such a big deal but I mean cover anything you're going to be on top of because it's going to drip follow the manual watch some youtube videos and have that it's pretty freaking cool they also said if you're going to do the vinyl accents to use a conditioner afterwards so there you go that's the tutorial on how cool it is to use steam to sanitize and clean your grooming environment I wonder if it would clean the backside of my grass my fake grass mats

I think it might

but it's 212 degrees but those are meant to last I think in the I don't know it just depends it's going to melt them you think it might melt them it's pretty hot yeah I know it's pretty hot

I was surprised yeah no I think it would be worth trying for 69 bucks you know that's a pretty reasonable deal maybe the groom podge should buy that for you yeah maybe yeah can you contest it because you know we are talking about clean in our grooming space pee pee grass is definitely something that needs to be cleaned yeah I got to clean my my fake grass or I'm going to lose it it's going to get tossed hey if anybody's got any ideas of how to clean the fake pee grass let Barbara know on our discussion group or contact her yeah I need help because my caretaker is complaining about the smell

oh hang on I've got a sound effect for that

you yeah yeah yeah it is yeah I know their pee pads and pee stuff is fragrant we don't want to hear about that anyway take a break be right back are yours shears working as hard as you are if you're ready to level up your scissoring game it's time to check out precision sharp whether you're sculpting intricate styles are tackling heavy bulk work their sliding thumb links and bobcat series are built for the job the link shares are your go-to for lightweight lightning fast precision while the bobcat series gives you that extra power and control you need for those challenging coats they hold an edge beautifully and feel perfectly balanced in your hand all day long thanks to the sliding thumb ring find your next favorite pair at precision sharp calm where performance meets perfection

rumors take your seats it's time for be birds classroom all right well we are going talk about something do you have your are you good I'm good all right we're going to talk about something that Barbara gave me as a gift many many many years ago and it's the phrase q-tip or quit taking it personally so Barbara I'm going to pass the microphone to you there you go there it is well wait there you go okay thank you very much so here's what's happening yesterday on the groom pod discussion group somebody was belly aching about how groomers these days seem to act I don't know mean mean to their customers mean girls we've all turned in we've we've kind of gone from playing the victim to being the mean girl and it's happy it uh seems to be that taking assertiveness to an extreme has resulted in conflicts with customers that we used to sort of like swallow and so it reminds me that taking things personally is the most common human weak spot we all do it we all take things personally not some more than others I was bad I was a very if I'm going to say that taking things personally really limited the growth uh and my growth and evolution as both a musician and a dog rumour because I just couldn't take criticism well I would melt I would melt down I would I mean I cried at a certification I actually cried it happened oh that's because my doctor of me crazy and then when I was over I had to take a written exam and that was that I just when it was hard and I'm embarrassed to say this but it's true and I I just happy to report that I finally kind of got a handle on it probably by writing about it and

I realized that uh taking it personally is because the mind itself is out to protect itself

you may think that your mind is your best friend but not so much mostly your mind is the biggest defender of itself that um you can imagine and this causes a lot of triggering

reactions because all of us have suffered uh district specced and you know like boi boi in um being the fat girl I you know very you say i have buck teeth buck teeth how we looked how we acted um you know children can be brutal to each other parents can be brutal too and maybe being very unaware um my father was an aware of all of the damage he was causing me by telling me uh I was pretty good looking except they didn't have enough boobs and stuff like that um that was what I was 16 they haven't even shown up yet in there in no matter what I did and one time I lost 50 pounds and I went to his like 50th uh college graduation celebration and we had a table of us and I took a date and all of that and right in front of my date and and these people that were important to our family he says uh and I was looking so good I mean I was like size 10 and that's a miracle for me and uh he says uh hey you're looking pretty good girl except what's this under your arm and he goes like this in front of me and I I just thought I would die you know I still have that what a jerk what a jerk you know yeah and when I when I graduated college with highest honors and uh Phi Beta Kappa which is like the you know the top 10 students of the liberal arts college I I was one of them I was one of 12 and out of a graduating class in like 1200 and he said well you sure are the dumbest Phi Beta Kappa I've ever known you know like he thought he was being funny he thought that was a joke no that read that that lowered me so what happened was I carried all of that stuff I carried you know being bullied by one of the girls that I had looked up to used to corner me in the bathroom and make me give her my lunch money and uh you know it should happen sorry I shouldn't laugh but and and you know it's so I became very sensitive to criticism and mostly would protect myself by just like not being able to take it so I I was sorry but the more I explored what was going on with myself I realized that I was taking things personally once I started kind of reading and once I started being a therapist well by the way I was a therapist for like 10 years or something so I have a little bit of experience with other people working through they're taking things personally it causes self-reflection of myself you know like I go home and say I wonder if I'm like her you know well yes we're on that way yes you are so the only to work yourself out of taking things personally is to own it and be able practice catching yourself in the act of taking things personally you know and you can do that by giving yourself like 10 minutes before you react give yourself 10 minutes to reflect on what's happening what's what's boiling your blood and the chances are the more you practice catching yourself in the act of taking things personally the more you can kind of get over it because you can shift yourself into a

more business like frame of reference like okay I put on my shop owner hat and my customer service hat and say you know like well tell me something more about how you feeling you know like in kind of draw people out and so that they're not just triggering your shit literally wow.

Susy 47:10

do you ever watch the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders pardon

me do you ever watch the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders the cheerleaders the show oh well they're too yeah they're too much for me

well in that show in that show they get behind the scenes and show the girls learning the dances oh okay I didn't see that no I just I just saw that the girls. No it's really fun to watch and as a gymnast it reminds me of how much criticism I've taken throughout my lifetime and on that show they have very strict rules in their organization that when you receive instruction from the person who's teaching the dance you say yes ma and that's all you say you don't get to talk back you don't get to tell them how you feel you just have to listen and take it and I think through that kind of action where you listen to the criticism and you digest it is exactly what you're talking about by taking a few minutes to think about what's being said because the immediate reaction when somebody says your toe wasn't pointed is yes it was I pointed my toe my toe was pointed I saw it out they're pointing it was pointed but in reality it probably wasn't pointed tight enough and you cannot always see that and someone on the outside might be able to see it so that's something that we can take and translate into our own selves about taking a moment and letting the person speak is another important part of that.

Barbara 48:49

Well you know I I think it's a natural response when someone criticizes you to make them the bad guy and yeah um it's like no you're seeing it wrong or no that's not what I am that's not I you know like you you got to make them bad and wrong and that the if you can stop making the other bad and wrong your way ahead of the game um you know it it but it requires reflection in in self-reflection and we're not taught how to do that I mean they really should teach us how there's certain things they should teach us in school that they're not they're not teaching us mental health skills they're just like coping they I mean I I if I was if I were in charge I would like redo the whole education thing so that there would just be built in things for conflict resolution

self-worth assessment you know not taking learning how to not take it personally all of this step should come um they just leave it up to the parents and if your parents are educating you and helping you do this you just have to wait till you grow up and spend the fortune on therapists

this is where taking the sports out of schools is taking out the ability to learn how to take criticism and I'm not saying I want kids out there bust and heads and banging on each other but what I do want is I want somebody who is observing a behavior and then telling you about it for you to be able to take that and learn from it and turn it into a positive not a negative and we are not getting that anywhere if we don't get it from sports we're not getting it anywhere so we're just left to our own devices which is pretty much to blame the other guy because that's what the mind does you know and so one of my motto is is don't believe everything you think right yeah don't believe that everything you think is true it might be your truth at the moment but taking some time to reflect uh how about the other person's point of view how about regarding

trying to put yourself in the other person's shoes we were hardly ever put ourselves in the shoes of the client because we think the shoes just don't fit but you know we've missed a once we fucked up we uh this is where we were peacefully when we weren't not happy about something we've done a lot of those things that we get angry at clients for doing we're all human we're all bozos on this bus that's one of my favorite that was it I don't know was it Beatles it was the Beatles or something that said that that in the sevenies that phrase hung on me like chewing gum in the bottom of my shoe we're all bozos on this bus we're all flawed fuck ups you know like so let's be patient with each other give somebody to clarify what they mean give someone a room to be mad be unhappy with you here so you make sure that you've got it right it also gives you a moment to think when you yeah if you if you uh and one of the important things in listening skills is actually repeating back in your own words what you hear the person saying okay so what I hear you say

is that deadada dead and it's that's not right they'll say no wait I didn't really mean that I am and D. D. D. D. D. you know like um so there's just a way to be tactful and to put your your your mind on the leash your mind is just like like an untrained puppy leaping here and leaping there and need to discipline your mind if you don't practice that you're never going to learn how to do it and you you discipline your mind by being more professional by not taking it personally so you can even practice not taking it personally when you are taking it personally and in fact that's the most important time to practice yeah that's like the 400 level class is to be able to hear yourself taking it personally but not say it not express it not do the right thing.

Susy 54:49

Yes. Absolutely. says "I think you're taking this personally give that some thought" right right on and on that note I think we're going to head on about our days today thanks for joining us we really appreciate it thank you for supporting us if you'd like to support us you can do so at our website thegrouppod.com and happy grooming everyone see you next time on the group pod bye

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